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19 and pregnant.

What it meant to be pregnant at 19. In a country like Nigeria.

It’s been two days since my last entry so I will go straight to the point.

Anyways, Chris was asking me stupid questions and I jokely asked if he wanted to marry me ni and the idiot said yes well I tot it was a joke until on Saturday he asked me to come and see his mother. My keyboard is acting weird so I will talk later chao

Maybe the intro should have been this

How I became pregnant

    It is exactly 1 year 3 months. That I had the guts to do it.

I found out I was pregnant with a child I didn’t even name. And then I had the option of doing it with 5k naira or 20k naira. You see more money, less risk. I don’t even know how I did it because I was scared for my life. I know right.

But if you were me that have watched so many pregnancy movies and know that most of them try to remove it in another way possible and then end up losing their womb. So I was sacred. I knew right from the time he came into me that I should have gotten a postpill. I was young and stupid, I had just turned 19. And I committed to starting you know doing it at age 19. Then I need to go to a pharmacy but my sister works in the only pharmacy I knew of.

And I tried to convince myself that I wouldn’t be.

And the time of the month came and I was still expecting the period. It passed and it still didn’t come then I summoned the courage to buy a pregnancy test and it freaking turned out positive, the Two of them. I was f***ING pregnant. Then when I became devastated and I had to call Isreal and tell him. He then gave the options. And I had to pick one. The gave me another option too. Bitter kola and bitter lemon. He told me that his girlfriend drinks it. It is use terminate a pregnancy.…………. Yeah yeah he got a girlfriend and I was foolish lol

 That his girlfriend also takes it anytime she want to abort his child. And I was wondering why they can’t simply use a condom instead of going though all that stress. But I was supposed to know. Because me too I am a slut so?.

The process

I tried It and it was one of the worst things that can ever happen in my life too. (the bitter kola and the drink). I could not even think about eating later but I had to remove the awful taste. And I called him and told him I don’t want to go through with it. I just had to deal with the fact that I was pregnant.

He then gave me the 20k option and I had to accept. He described the place for me gave me money and told me to go and do it. When I got there, I saw a man there and I said I was looking for the person that owns the place. He asked what I wanted and I said I need to do an abortion. His next reaction made me feel like useless. When she came, she asked how far I was gone I was. 3 months I said. Those your boyfriend know about it? Uh, it’s James and she was like what in the world.

She had to say that wasn’t what she was talking about. I said it was isreal that got me pregnant. She then said she will have to give me some injections. 6 injections and 2 pills to push up my v***na. She went on about washing your vagina, this that. Which shouldn’t even be but I wonder which kind of person will tell a girl of 19 to do that (19 that was already pregnant) . Anyways I had to do it when I got home. And then it came in the middle of the night. I was in hell, I had cramps that I don’t wish on anybody and it went on for two days, I just have to be eating and sleeping because it was too bad.

I stayed in bed for 14 days, I might even have seen the fetus one certain day. 14days I bleed. NEVER AGAIN

 2020 edit:

I can’t find the page after this so I wouldn’t say to be continued. So there will be a break in transition because I called this 8 and 9. 10 and 12 are missing and I don’t know what I wrote in there so I can’t improvise but I think we would understand. So I can’t tell you the remaining pregnant story

NoTE: I am sorry that it’s when I feel sad that I write. From now on I will also write happy tot or try and remember happy moments and give you guys feedback because this should not only be a safe space but also a happy space. And pls nice comments I am been through a lot, thank you for reading I really appreciate it.

Sending love and light to the world

Signing out


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